
We do not control anything.
Second of the articles about the Catalonia-Spain conflict from the point of view of Happiness. Or how to be happy despite the political circumstances in which we live.
Because I am convinced that the strategies that help us to be happier can and should be applied to the different avatars that life present to us, today I will continue with the second of the eight articles that try to apply them to this issue, without going into the political issue that originated it, in order that we can maintain happiness in the middle of so much uneasiness.
8 strategies that I will comment on 8 different articles:
1. Reality and its lack of acceptance
2. We do not control anything
3. Binary thinking: with me or against me
4. Better to be fine than wanting to be right
5. To desire or not to desire a nation, that is the question
6. The pleasure of a nation or the absence of suffering a conflict: you choose
7. Life is not fair. Why has only one politician made a good choice?
8. Why 40% is a political issue and 60% is a problem of poor communication
2. We do not control anything
This phrase, which, a priori, might seem disconcerting and undesirable, can, well understood, become a very useful mantra that acts in our favor.
Although we have been taught that not losing a «supposed control» is desirable, the truth is that we control nothing. Life happens despite our efforts to direct it.
We can not get people to vote for the option that we believe is fairer and better. Not even those who are related to my convictions, I will be able to demand that they act in the way that I think they should. It is an exhausting business because it is unattainable.
Why? over time I’ve realized that the only reality we can try to change is ourselves, and even then, sometimes we’re surprised by disappointing ourselves … well, when things depend on more than one, be it two, or even worse, between 7 and/or 46 million people like in these circumstances, to try a change, to pretend that so many people join the alternative preferred by me, is improbable, just pie in the sky.
While there are supporters, detractors, equidistant and skeptical of this or that option, the truth is that each of us think personally about this issue. Pretending to join a more or less similar group in order to obtain a supposed common benefit is difficult. Stop, I do not say that it can not be desirable, especially if we are dealing with issues about human rights or minimum ethics that concern us all, but we must recognize that it will be very difficult to put so many people in agreement on such an important issue which some consequences are right now difficult to determine.
Therefore, if we do not have real control over others, if we realize that we really do not have control over almost nothing … accepting this it is the wisest formula. From this healthy acceptance that we do not control anything or anyone, a state of relaxation will result, of abandonment to what is to come.
Caution, I insist, it does not mean that we should not try, the ideals are to dream them, what I mean is that once we have thought globally about the idea that excites us, we can act locally and personally (for example: in this case to choose to vote for the closest political party) and then, immediately, we should learn to disconnect from the topic, let it be done, respect the different options of each of the participants and, therefore, relax. Take a certain distance from the facts so that they do not prevent our life from continuing to feel happy in our daily lives.
It’s not easy… It’s necessary!
Rely our happiness on an achievement that depends on many persons is an important strategic error because it is our of our control.
Do you realize the useless energy that you spend when you do not accept the inevitable, what has already happened or is happening without you being able to do anything to prevent it from happening?
If we manage to take out what happens, not an advantage, but a learning, it would be less difficult for us, and things would happen the same.
We do not control anything. Things happen. Things are.
A possible consolation?: «Everything changes, nothing remains. Change is the only constant «. Heraclitus
#BetalltoBlack entry 2 of 8
